Where I've been

Here's the deal: at the end of my pregnancy, I was no fun to be around, including on the internet. So I saved everyone the trouble of having to listen to my laments via written word and just hunkered down and waited for the funk to pass and our little boy to get here.

Well, the funk has passed indeed and our little boy is finally here. Albeit, I'm writing about this after he's an entire month old. Don't fret, I shall be recapping the best parts of the time that I wasn't around, including some fun right before our little Ham was born, his birth, and our recent move (!) and new home.

To tide you over, here is a lovely shot of him sleeping this morning, allowing me to write this short post!

Drum roll...

I can't believe I waited a whole week to post this, but on Monday we found out that our ever anticipated second child is a...

BOY!

I won't shame him already by posting the proof of his little bits on the web, but he is indeed a HE and we are ready for the adventure of raising a son in addition to our beautiful little girl.

Going into the ultrasound appointment, I was really nervous and a little scared (I don't know why!) and after the tech told us, I shed a tear of disbelief and happiness and continued to say "We're having a boy!" for the rest of the week at random intervals of time.

Now any recommendations for "boy" clothes, toys, etc. can be sent my way immediately. I can't wait!

The big return

I know I know.

I've been gone.

And with good reason. We're expecting our second child!

With that came the sickness. Not normal morning sickness. Hyperemesis gravidarum. Three trips to the ER. A 2.5 day stay on the Labor & Delivery floor.

Things are much better now (prayers are always welcome for continued health) and we are "over the moon" excited to become parents of two!

Because I can't not talk about it

We found out March 6^th. Very early but very clearly.

In a matter of 10 days, things went from normal to awesome to normal again. But a different normal. A new normal.

One day, it was there. And now its not.

You were wanted. We miss you already, but we'll be OK. A different OK, forever changed -- but OK.

I choose to talk about it because I know this is normal. Not a great situation, but far more prevalent than people wish to acknowledge. I know I'm not alone. That I am one of many that experience, this but I won't do it quietly. I know we are not the only family that is going through this or will go through this. So I talk, when I'm ready. And I listen to others and their stories because that is what we need. To talk and to be listened to.

For the rest of the afternoon, after the news sunk in, we played with Bird, so so grateful that we have her. All her laughter, smiles, giggles, curls, steps, kisses, everything, made it feel OK. We are so very blessed and know that God has an amazing plan for our little family. His plan, His timing.

We are ready for the ride.

Because I never told the story

She arrived on the scene at this time last year.

This is Bird's birth story - might be a little TMI for some, just a warning.

January 17th 2010, I was just trying to hold it all in. Literally. We were at my parents house to celebrate my oldest brother's 36th birthday with a family dinner before he returned to Philadelphia on a flight the next day. I apparently looked like I was struggling, my mom told me later. It had been a kind a rough day already, with my tummy seizing up, regularly but not painfully, over the past couple weeks and especially the last 12 hours.

We headed home after handing out hugs and receiving a quick, "Don't have that baby on my birthday!" and tried to get some sleep. T and I thought we were going to bed early, calling 10-10:30 pm early for those days when sleep was evading me, and therefore the both of us.

Around midnight, I just couldn't sleep anymore and I didn't know why. About half an hour of tossing and turning on my part left me with one answer. I had to go. #2. That's right.

I was feeling a few pains and thinking they might be contractions but didn't want to wake T for nothing, so I went to do my business and kinda kept time on my own. After some "success" but still feeling a pressure to produce and some pain still cycling through, I thought I better wake T up. I didn't get to say "It's time!" or anything that dramatic but I did shake him and mutter something to the effect of, "I think this is it." This was around 1:30 am.

We started to really time things out and all the while I just wanted to stay in the bathroom, on my special seat and never leave, because the pressure was really getting to me. We waited until they were so many minutes apart regularly and then waited an hour from that time (around 2:30 am) before we decided it was time to call the doctor and head out. There were walks around the living room, bags to finish packing, and coffee (yes coffee, that I am now thankful that T stopped for!) to be made. About 3 am we called my doctor and told her we were heading in and that I was in labor. Lucky for us the hospital was 7 minutes away and it was the middle of the night. There were definitely a few red lights run. We got to the hospital and T parked and helped me walk inside, which was a feat in itself, with the snow and ice covered parking lot and my contractions growing closer and stronger every minute.

It was 3:30 am when I finally got up to the triage, they checked me and I was already at a 6. The nurses were surprised and began to get me ready for my delivery. I was asked what I wanted to do about pain management. I told the truth: I'm not good with pain but I really want to try a natural birth. I would regret that in about an hour, but when all was said and done I'm happy I had a drug free birth.

For the next two hours it was a roller coaster of breathing, focusing, vomiting, back rubs, position changes, groans and grunts, and calming words from T and my amazing nurse Mary. I can honestly say I never imagined myself in half the "positions" I was in for comfort, with so much of my person exposed, but in the moment I think you cease to care about modesty!

Around 5 am I really felt the need to push and my doctor still wasn't there. I was asked if I wanted to wait for her and thought to myself, "I don't think that is up to me, I think you should ask this little person who wants out. I don't care who catches them, but they are ready to say hello!" Within minutes of that, my doctor showed up, swooped in, I was in position and pushing.

About 20-25 minutes later, I was asked if I wanted to look down at my daughter. I was so confused because a) this whole time I thought I was carrying a boy (just a guess) and b) I was too focused on pushing to want to check anything out. But there she was.

January 18, 2010, 5:30 am, 19.5 inches, 7 lbs. 2 oz.

T cut the cord and he brought her to me and everything else kind melted away as the doctors finished up their work down below and T just smiled at me holding our little lady.  As the staff faded out of the room and they periodically came to check on me before moving us to our recovery room, it got so quiet and our little family of 3 could just be, before the phone calls and announcements and congratulations.

It was just us. Three birds.

Where everybody knows your name

Everyone wants a place to go where everybody knows who you are.  Nobody wants that place to be the dentist.

Apparently I gargle sugar for fun and my pregnancy wreaked more havoc on my body than originally thought.

I went to the dentist last week to get a filling fixed that had cracked.  I just got back from the dentist today where they fixed three teeth next to one another with cavities.  The ladies at the dental office are great because they love to visit with Bird while I get my services, entertaining her and keeping me from having to get a sitter for an hour or so.  They joked that they would have to create some issue so I would have to come back and they could see her again.  In my head I said that I'm sure something will just come up on its own knowing my teeth's record.

Sure enough, I get done with my fillings and they inform me that I have another one waiting to be filled.  I have an appointment for next week.  That's right, 3 appointments, 3 weeks in a row.

Just call me Norm.

She's here

and she's perfect...

Our little Bird showed up on Monday, Jan. 18th at 5:30 am, weighing in at 7 lbs. 2 oz. and stretching out to 19.5". She has a full head of dark hair and dark eyes (like mama) and a teeny mouth and big appetite (like papa).

The intense part of labor was short, about four hours, and we were released from the hospital around 3 on Tuesday. I can only say that I am so very thankful that T was by my side for this experience as I truly couldn't have done it without him.

Family and friends have been by to see her and to help take care of T and I while we take care of Bird. We couldn't be more grateful for those that have brought meals, spent time with us, or kept us in their prayers throughout this entire pregnancy.

Two words describe us right now: blessed and exhausted.

Nursery Pics

Here they are:

Today:

We had our childbirth class and hospital tour
My mom brought us dinner
T found a coupon for Dunkin Donuts in the book he got from the library
I ate Tums from a stranger
T read a chapter from Johannes Cabal - The Necromancer to the baby
Little B was very active in my belly
I talked to K in Chicago and smiled
We found out what towheaded meant
I practiced my breathing to calm my anxiety
We found presents for Christmas to get T's parents

All around great day...

Well its back

My exhaustion that is...

I'm in my third trimester and only have 2 months left to go, if everything goes to plan, and I'm simply exhausted again.

This time it is from carrying around our little 3 lb. ham. Did I mention that I love this baby? "I love you, B. I just can't wait to meet you. Could you please be on time for our get together in February? You know, your birth? That would be great."

One of these days, hopefully this week, I'll post pics of the nursery, which has been done for a couple of sleepy weeks.

The wait is over

The last few months have gone by in a blur and I haven't taken the time to write for one big reason...

We're expecting our first child!

That's right, I've not been around the internets much since June due to all the sleeping that my pregnancy has induced. I keep making plans to jump back in and then the bed beckons to me.

I first alluded to our surprise here, finding out on Memorial Day that we were pregnant.

That's really all the news I have since that is really all that's going on at the moment.